Literature of the Black Atlantic

Only recently have I fully come to terms with the fact that my parents are indeed fallible. Growing up, I learned to accept their opinions and demands as the final say. Contradicting their orders usually resulted in some sort of punishment, or the realization that I probably should have listened. However, as I have grown older and separated myself from home for a significant amount of time, it has become clear to me that my parents are human, and that they continue to learn everyday. I guess when one becomes a parent there is no innate knowledge that tells you how to raise your children. You simply do the best that you can.

It is slightly embarrassing to admit, but I have to confess that my sometimes old-fashioned and blue-collar parents did not foresee my enrollment in college. They had no “college fund,” or notion that I would pursue an education beyond high school. Both are of a generation for which college was a luxury, but not exactly a necessity. As my mom framed it to me, “girls did three things: worked as a secretary, a teacher, or a nurse.” It wasn’t until I began doing really well in high school and they began speaking with other parents and my teachers that they realized I should continue on to college. Even then, they surmised that I would pursue a career-oriented major, such as Business or Engineering.

I can’t begin to describe how unsupportive they were when I initially told them that I wanted to be an English major. In fact, I spent a year in the Communication Studies program because I thought it would be a kind of compromise between Business and English. But like Adjoa, in Aidoo’s The Girl Who Can, I have begun to surprise my parents. Opportunities for students, for English majors, and for women are everyday expanding. Last year, when I told my parents that I would be traveling to Europe with a class for Spring Break, they were speechless. It was an opportunity that neither of them had ever been offered, and that they had never considered for me. I received a similar reaction when I told that that I wanted to study abroad at Oxford University. And as I continue to find jobs and land internships, they beam with pride.

I cannot say that they have changed completely. My parents are much like Adjoa’s grandmother who is excessively proud and supportive, but that cries and mutters over her debunked notions. My parents too are excessively proud and supportive, but still have such limited foresight that it is impossible for them to imagine how far I might go. They still wish I had gone to school to be an Engineer, and both have their own “ideas” about what I should do after college. But, like Adjoa, I have my own ideas, and I too have realized that it’s much better to “act it out to show them.”