the sparkling dimension

As he stumbled into his college, barely able to flash his ID card at the porter, Rhodri tried to remember what had happened that night. The only clear thing he could recall was that a stranger had carried him back to his school. Besides that, things got a bit blurry for Rhodri.
Going out with his football team after a brilliant victory over their rival college, Rhodri only had one thing on his mind: celebrate. One drink became two, two became four, and the chugging contests put him over the edge. Staggering out the door of the bar, Rhodri called for his team to follow him in slurred, barely comprehensible speech, but the rest of them were too preoccupied with their food and drinks to notice him.
Aimlessly running over the Isis River on a footbridge to get to the center of town and the majority of the pubs, Rhodri noticed something sparkling in the water. Having lost all sense of inhibition, he dove into the water in pursuit of the sparkle. Instead of swimming back to the surface once he was submerged, Rhodri felt himself being sucked deeper into the river until eventually his surroundings became something that he’d never seen before. He felt as if he’d been sucked into another dimension, another time – which is exactly what had happened! He’d been transferred into the Sparkling Dimension of the Isis River that only drunk people could gain access to. Here, whatever thought came to mind, the Sparkling Dimension would make a reality out of the person’s initial thought. At this moment, since he felt discombobulated and beaten from the transfer into the dimension, Rhodri imagined himself on the bottom of a scrum in a rugby game. So naturally, the Sparkling Dimension transferred Rhodri to the nearest rugby game, which happened to be in Dublin, Ireland. Here, Rhodri spent a good chunk of his night in a frantic, inebriated state trying his best to stay on his feet while also trying to score, since the team he was on just happened to be his favorite team, the Leinster Lions. Eventually, Rhodri’s inebriation wore off and he became more tenacious in his gameplay until a nasty brute of a player blindsided him when he had the ball. At this point, since Rhodri was knocked unconscious, the Sparkling Dimension retransferred Rhodri back to his original location in Oxford. Still unconscious, he was expelled from the Isis River high into the air and landed on the sidewalk on the bank of the river. In a comatose state, Rhodri remained there for the remainder of the night, until a kind stranger offered to carry him home to his college. Not remembering a thing, since the Sparkling Dimension erased the memory of its users, Rhodri went to bed late that night in a confused yet sober state of mind. "At least I won't be hungover in the morning," he thought. And if he could remember, he would have thanked the Sparkling Dimension for preventing his hangover.